A day.

There was a day.

When I first knew of you.
A little earlier than expected.
And my heart skipped.
And I cried with suprise.

There was a day.
When I was told you were she.
Which I truly could not believe.
And my heart sang.
And I cried with gratitude.

There was a day.
When you arrived so quietly.
You. Finally. It was you.
And my heart burst.
And I cried with happiness.

There was a day.
When I bought you a tutu.
Pink, and sparkly, of course.
And my heart danced alongside you.
And I cried with love.

There was a day.
Like any other day.
Except you left for Heaven.
And my heart broke.
And I cried. Endless tears.

There was a day.
It was yesterday.
Ivy said she wanted to ring you.
And my heart ached.
And Daddy cried.

There was a day
That should have been your birthday.
We'll celebrate it anyway.
But our hearts mourn.
And tears, we still cry.

My darling Ava.

No matter how much I want to celebrate your birth on this day, it is so buried underneath the sorrow of what should have been.

You should be excited.
You should be here.
You should be five.

I can only imagine what you might have looked like now, what toys you would have
loved, what cake you would have wanted. Would your squeals sound older? Would your hair be longer? Would you have had a party?

I bought a pinata..a Dora one. And a tiara. And so many balloons. Be ready to catch them, won't you?

Happy Birthday, my little Superprincess.

Iloveyousomuch.
Mumma. xx